Monday, May 19, 2014
Jennifer Lynn Eckrote - Ten Years
However, when I see her precious son now and realize he is fifteen whereas in this photo he was five, I have to accept that reality.
I've wondered what I would say or what I would do, if anything, on this day. Initially I thought I would pass it alone in reflection. However I realize that I do that daily when I meditate.
I discussed my feelings with my son and a friend. It gave me direction to go on today and know that Jen is here in spirit with me and would want that I have a good day. She was always that way.
So, John, my son and Julie, my daughter will handle their remembrances in their own way. I, by writing this.
Yesterday I got down the big basket with all Jennifer's mementos in it to look at and reminisce. Literally, right on top of the things was something that I don't remember ever seeing before. It is a page from a calendar. Jennifer had torn the page out and so help me, the page was yesterday's date! Whoa. It sums up her philosophy of life in many ways.
She was always out feeding the homeless under the bridges or rescuing feral cats and taming them. In her last few years of life, she was raising butterflies with Christopher. She always had this aura about her - even as a child. Just like her brother and her sister, she was always giving and doing for others. Of course, I could go on and on. Suffice to say, that she is missed.
Here's what was on the top of the things yesterday. I sense that Jennifer wanted it to be shared.
JOY BEYOND FUN
I don't think any sensitive person can be satisfied with having fun, no matter how much of it we may cram into our lives. Our need is not for pleasure but for joy - a deep sense of fulfillment that not only never leaves us but actually increases with the passage of time. Fun is living for ourselves; joy comes from living for others, giving our time and love to a purpose greater then ourselves.
Thousand Names of Vishnu, p. 135
Thanks for all the memories.