I've always thought Father's Day is so important. It always appeared to me that fathers were the strong, silent ones who never complained, worked all the time and in the case of my dad, sometimes had a hole in the sole of his shoe that he NEVER complained about to anyone. I was going to write about him, and I still might, but I observe a younger father on a regular basis. It seemed to me that fathering today is much different then it was sixty or seventy years ago.
It's still the same about being the strong, silent, never complaining part. But the involvement of a father today, especially a single father, is totally different. Way, way more involved.
Growing up in the 40's and 50's I don't remember ever meeting a single dad. Ever. But, in the 80's and 90's after being widowed and dating, I met and dated several single fathers who were raising their children alone.
Selfless, sensitive, kind men - all of them. Even a few years ago I was blessed to know and date a man who raised SIX kids alone. It was a privilege to know all of them and him, to put it mildly. A great memory.
Now I watch on a regular basis as my son has partial custody of his children on two days a week that are always his favorite days. He looks forward to the time with great enthusiasm. He comes up with all kinds of innovative things to do and places to go. One of their favorites is to play on the playground equipment at various places and parks in town. Another is to go on environmental hikes up at the botanical gardens. It's always something.
Friends tell me they see the three of them walking down the street or at the organic market - always having fun. Big smiles and laughter.
To tell you the truth, I don't think I ever went anywhere with my Dad alone in all my years at home. He worked and he came home. We cooked in the backyard and watched TV as a family, but other then that, I don't think Dads back then were nearly as involved with the day to day care of their children.
For me, it's fun to just observe the shenanigans of the kids with their dad. It makes me know that all is right with their world along with the fact that these are memories and lessons that will impact them for their whole lives.
For my son, the rest of the world melts away when he is with Sebastian and Matilda. The most important thing to him is being their Father.
Happy Father's Day John.
AND, Happy Father's Day to all the Fathers out there reading this. You are VERY important and loved.
9 comments:
I always knew John would make a wonderful Dad when he had children. They are his world and you see that in the photos and I just know that to be true in my heart! Barbara you raised a wonderful caring and loving Son!
Cordy, so wonderful of you to write.
You and your husband knew John in his carefree sailboat days but even then he had such love for his nieces and nephews always longing to marry and have his own children.
I'm so happy he got his wish.
Indeed he is a caring and loving son and man!
BTW, he thinks the world of you and your John as well. Says you're two of the nicest people he has ever known......
It's wonderful to see a father so committed to his children. They will likely grow up to be very strong and self assured because of that relationship. I agree that parenting for men has changed radically since we were kids.
Parenting has changed so much. My dad was much like yours. Dinner, vacations, and church were the times we spent together. So glad you have your son and his children close to you. That's a gift!
Shannon, isn't it interesting how different it is? And, I think our fathers realized that they missed out my working all the time.
Thanks for commenting.
Beck, I'm so grateful for this gift to be able to see and spend time with the little ones.
It was quite a surprise to have this opportunity at this point in my life. I've now had grandchildren for 22 years! How blessed is that?
Those are three beautiful children. And the pictures are the beast!
Or maybe that should be "best."
Vandy, indeed they are two beautiful children....well if you count John, it's three!
Thanks for the comment........
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